• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to footer

alex@alexstaniforth.com

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • YouTube
Alex Staniforth

Alex Staniforth

Adversity Adventurer, Motivational Resilience Speaker, Author and Mental Health Activist

  • HOME
  • ALEX
    • Bio
    • Charity
    • Sponsors
    • Media
  • SPEAKING
  • ADVENTURE
    • Climb The UK
  • 3 PEAKS RUN
  • MIND OVER MOUNTAINS
  • WORDS
    • FAQS
  • BOOKS
Contact Alex

Feeling overwhelmed? You’re not alone.

You are here: Home / Mental Health / Feeling overwhelmed? You’re not alone.

December 8, 2022 by AdversityAdventurer Leave a Comment

Last month I was grabbing lunch at Pret in London Euston before a speaking gig, when the inevitable suddenly hit me. It was coming faster than the overpriced cinnamon syrup in my latte.

… Christmas music.

Yes, it’s that time of the year again. A joyous time of celebration, rest and recovery. And a time that can also be overwhelming and incredibly demanding for others.

I find myself in the latter camp. The swarm of social obligations, buying meaningful gifts, commercialism and excessive indulgence just add an extra layer of marzipan to the festive stress cake.

A few friends have recently described feeling ‘overwhelmed’, so naturally I took the liberty of writing a blog post about this.

But what do we mean by ‘overwhelm’?

The dictionary says: “to bury or drown beneath a huge mass of something, especially water.”

Ironic in the Lake District, perhaps. But for this, I’m going to focus on emotional overwhelm; where emotions become so strong that they overpower our ability to cope. It can affect us physically (headaches, racing heartbeat, insomnia), cognitively (difficulty concentrating, making decisions or solving problems) and emotionally (irrational thoughts, mood swings, pessimism).

Overwhelm can be caused by a variety of things, like health issues, major life events, workload, bereavement to name but a few.

Christmas can be especially overwhelming for people experiencing bereavement, which is undoubtedly the worst kind of grief. But bereavement isn’t all about losing a loved one. It can also be the loss of our identity: be it a career, sport, or caring for someone else.

Personally, the loss of running and exercise with Long Covid since May has drastically reduced my usual coping ability for life stressors, and left me feeling overwhelmed at times, particularly after regular relapses of symptoms.

These changes can bring a surge of cortisol or ‘stress hormones’ and feel overwhelming. The classic Kubler-Ross ‘Change Curve’ is a useful albeit simplistic way of thinking about it. We can probably see ourselves in each of the stages, but I’ve found that these stages don’t come in some predictable order. They come in waves. Over the last few months, I’ve found myself stuck in the depression stage quite frequently, before crawling my way back into the light of the acceptance phase once again.

So… how do we cope with feeling overwhelmed?

Take stock. First off, write a list. Sometimes getting it out of our heads and onto paper can help to decipher what’s an actual problem and what has grown from irrational thinking. This way we can break it down into manageable stages and start with the most important bits rather than feeling paralysed.

Slow down. This might sound counter-intuitive but when overwhelmed we tend to speed up and work harder in a bid to regain control, but instead our efficacy drops and we end up running around fighting wildfires like a 6-year-old with a SuperSoaker. Breathwork has been a recent addition to my toolkit. To be honest, I had always snuffed the idea as a bit hippy-ish. Until I discovered compelling science around the benefits, particularly for calming down the autonomous nervous system and switching to the parasympathetic ‘rest and repair’ state, which is thought to be closely involved in the manifestation of Long Covid and other chronic illnesses.

Clear the noise. President Barack Obama was famously reported to have only two colours of suit, so that he could save his cognitive energy for more important decisions. If only Trump had taken note… Still, decluttering our physical environment can declutter our mental space too. In your schedule, start with the non-negotiable ‘rocks’ – like a booked holiday, appointment, or project – and work the rest around them. Set a deadline for decisions and trust that you made the best choice with what you knew at the time. Building a consistent routine, like planning your weekly training out in advance, can save us the analysis paralysis of things that don’t really matter. And don’t forget that sage old mantra to new commitments: if it’s not a ‘hell yes’, it’s a ‘no’!

Focus on what you can control. Whilst it would be nice to knock the Ukraine war on the head or boycott Christmas altogether – we can’t. But we can change our exposure to it. We can excuse ourselves from excessive social commitments or limit our time on social media. The ‘Freedom’ app is a great way to block our access to social media apps for a set time each day, during work hours, or even taking a break altogether – especially when everyone else on Instagram seems to be out running and you’re popping more Antihistamines with a banging headache.

Let it all out. The paradox of depression is that it can make us withdraw and isolate from others. In reality, this is exactly the opposite of what we need to recover. It’s a big red flag when we stop making plans and commitments because we don’t feel like it, or showing up as our usual selves is too exhausting. But we’re social animals, even the introverted types, and social contact puts the brakes on the stress response we get from feeling isolated. Other people have the benefit of being outside the weeds – and can take a more rational perspective on the issue that we might not have. N.B If you’re the person being ignored by a friend or relative – please don’t take it personally or try to ‘fix’ anything. But please do keep showing up, be present and offer a non-judgemental space to listen. We do appreciate it.

Acceptance. Focusing on the now can be uncomfortable. Projecting ourselves into the future and striving for goals provides the ability to imagine a better place and the hope we need to move forwards. Recently I’ve started to accept I simply don’t know if or when I’ll be able to set goals, challenges or run properly again. And nobody else knows either. Rest assured, I haven’t absconded myself to a Bohemian green tea-drinking meditative existence in a remote forest (yet) and I’m fully determined to be back doing what I love most, at whatever cost. But accepting change allows us to focus on what we can control right now, rather than what we can’t and repeating the same process in the hope of somehow getting a different result.

On that note, I recently discovered that I had less than 20 Wainwright summits to complete. For those that don’t know, the Wainwrights are a collection of 214 hills in the Lake District, immortalised by legendary fell-walker and author Alfred Wainwright.

Slow hill-walking seems to be in my ‘green zone’ right now, without causing a relapse of Long Covid symptoms, and I’m very grateful for that. So I’ve now focused on completing the Wainwrights before the end of the year. Luckily, Wainwright created the map, so all I have to do is choose the next summit and take one small step at a time. Seasons change, and so do we.

Tackling the Wainwrights

Whatever helps you to overcome overwhelm – I hope you get lots of it for Christmas. As always, get in touch if I can help.

Category iconMental Health,  Motivation Tag iconchristmas mental health,  christmas overwhelm,  long covid,  long covid recovery,  mindset,  overcoming overwhelm,  overwhelm,  recovery,  tips for overwhelm

Subscribe to Blog via Email

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 42 other subscribers.

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

WANT A FREE CHAPTER?
Join my newsletter for new challenge announcements, blogs, events and a free sample of my new book 'Another Peak'...
We respect your privacy.

 

Partners

Footer

Alex’s Charity

 

 

 

 

Mind Over Mountains is a charity restoring mental health naturally through therapeutic outdoor experiences.

Read more and join us at: www.mindovermountains.org.uk

Contact Alex
alex@alexstaniforth.com

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy

Instagram

alexstaniforth_

Climbing mountains and the mind.
Charity Founder @mindomountains
🌎 The Lake District #GetOutside
Athlete @inov_8 @ordnancesurvey @ellisbrigham

Alex Staniforth - Adventurer
Back where it all began. Running with my old man! Back where it all began. Running with my old man!

Last March I got my Parkrun PB at Keswick and this weekend got my slowest at Fell Foot.

The plan was to keep my heart rate under 145bpm to avoid another crash of fatigue, which meant walking most of the hills. It took the discipline of Yoda not to set off chasing people like the good old days, especially when my dad overtook me in the first km. 

I hated exercise as a kid. On holiday in France my stepmum bribed me with €2 to run a mile with him. That was a lot of money back then... I hated every minute but dad inspired me to enter a 10km race for charity, and the rest is history. Dad came to watch every race since, as I happily claimed the family record at every distance from 5km to marathon, whilst he retired to become a Parkrun tourist. 

Never thought he'd beat me again, but never forget where you started.
.
#LongCovid #TheComeback #MatchingJackets #parkrun #loveparkrun #fellfootpark
#LakeDistrict #lakedistrictuk #runninginspiration #Fellfoot #windermere #parkruntourist #fatherson
Much-needed adventure inspiration from @mrmarkbeau Much-needed adventure inspiration from @mrmarkbeaumont on his Faster tour at Rheged last weekend. 

Mark is the fastest person to cycle around the world in 80 days (that's 240 miles a day... for perspective) amongst many other records. He's been a huge personal inspiration and kindly endorsed my 2nd book.

So much resonated, but a few favourite takeaways: 

- Trust the process, the bigger picture will always take care of itself. 

- Remove the faff. His team had to ensure he was on the bike by 4am, not 4:05am. That would have added an entire day to his record.

- Mark had 40 people working on his world record. He knew that if he failed, the whole team failed. 

- Good times won't last forever, but that means the bad ones won't either... 

Thanks Mark. Grab his books, talks and films if you're needing some adventure inspiration! 

#faster #worldcycle #ultracycling #markbeaumont #inspiration #80days #mindset #cyclingheroes #rheged #ultracyclist 
@speakersfromtheedge
214/214 Wainwrights complete! Somehow it's taken 214/214 Wainwrights complete! 

Somehow it's taken 12 years, 8 months and 25 days since my first summit, Souther Fell, aged 14 (swipe for evidence). For those who don't know, the Wainwrights are a list of 214 summits created by legendary writer Alfred Wainwright. There was no better hill to finish than the aptly named 'Great Cockup', with a great crowd of friends.

The record is 5 days 12 hrs 14 mins... If only we hadn't stopped for a sandwich 😂 

Meanwhile @thehodfather666 is currently climbing all 214 with a 4 stone hod of house bricks, to raise money for @mindomountains.

However fast you go, there's something strangely addictive about this collection of fells. It's been a fun project to explore the Lakes and maybe one day I'll start again to see how fast I can get around... 

📸@danobeaumont

#GreatCockup #Wainwrights #LakeDistrict #Hillwalking  #GetOutside #Lakes #peakbagging #wainwrightswalks
A big welcome to the first CEO of @mindomountains, A big welcome to the first CEO of @mindomountains, Ian Sansbury! 

When Chris and I founded the charity in 2020 we never imagined how big it would become. From the flagship event with @adventureuncovered to delivering 27 events last year, supporting 300+ people with their mental health, including the NHS, Police and Ambulance Service.

Leadership is about creating a vision, and building a great team to achieve it - like our wonderful trustees, team and 50+ freelance staff who continually go above and beyond. 

It’s also knowing your strengths and weaknesses, when ironically it's compromised my own mental health sometimes too. As the charity grows I'm not the right person to take it where it needs to be, so it can reach everyone who needs our help.

Feeling like a proud parent sending their kids off to start school, with less crying, but I'm super excited to see the charity grow and support even more people with Ian’s expertise. 

I’ll remain heavily involved as a trustee (and Chief Interference Officer) to support the team, tell the story and raise money through daft adventures… 

Thanks to everyone who's been part of the first chapter. Onwards!

#NewChapter #MyBaby  #MentalHealthCharity #MindOverMountains
Load More… Follow on Instagram
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2023 Alex Staniforth. All rights reserved.

Implemented by Koogar Integrated Marketing

Return to top